Being Delores
by Dear Pigfarts. Love the Doctor
Summary: 5 drabbles based on the time Delores Jane Umbridge was teaching at Hogwarts (Written for a Hogwarts Assignment) (Used to be called 'Umbridge Drabbles')


**_Defense_** ** _Against the Dark Arts  
_** **Assignment #12 – Recap  
Dolores Umbridge  
** _5 drabbles – during time as teacher of Hogwarts_

* * *

Drabble 1 - 163

The nerve of some of these children! I just do not understand how they can be so rude and think they will get away with it. Their other teachers may let it slide – but not in my classroom, not in my school. I have had non-stop backchat from the older students, while the younger seemed to know to keep their tiny, little, worm mouths shut. Good little things…

Although that Harry Potter is being a real pain in my–

 _Calmly, Delores_.

He will have to be taught a lesson, hopefully one that will lead to his mischievous friends learning it too. I could use the quill? Would the Minister approve? His loveliness has already approved of me fixing this school, and if I must bend a few rules to do so… how can he get mad at me?

Watch out, Mr Potter. You're about to learn the proper way to conduct yourself in a classroom.

 _That really was supposed to sound more threatening._

* * *

Drabble 2 - 240

"You're not allowed to do any _serious_ damage to them…" she wiggled her eyebrows, hoping the squib understood the meaning behind her spasms. Filch winked as best he could, but it came out more like a blink crossed with a stroke. Delores giggled her disgusting laugh, which sent shivers down the spines of all students who were unfortunate enough to hear it.

The two most despised beings in Hogwarts stared at each other, their hearts beating at a similarly excelled rate. Why they were suddenly lost in each other's eyes was a question even to them. But in that moment; with the vision of screaming, hanging children in the mind of one, and the destruction of Potter's powers in the other – they suddenly felt a pull that neither could resist.

The clatter of dusty chains echoed around the hall as Filchs' hands released them to grasp the pudgy face of Delores Umbridge. Their lips met and in the commotion of a passionate kiss, neither heard the horrified gasp of two unfortunate first years that had just rounded the corner. The girls paled as they slowly backed away from the embracing pair and ran, as if for their lives, back to their common room. They told their story to an unconvinced crowd and were left with shaking heads and compliments on their 'very imaginative joke'.

The Toad and the Caretaker: an unlikely story that takes a strong stomach to behold.

* * *

Drabble 3 - 213

Her eyes widened as she looked up into the face of the giant, the monster, the –

She could not help it as the scream left her lips. Scrambling back towards the vile students, she grasped at their shirts as she felt fat fingers wrap around her waist.  
"Help me!" She pleaded as her fingers slipped from the Potter boys' collar. His face was shocked, with a hint of glee shining behind those disgustingly green eyes. She snared, "I knew it!" She thought to herself. "They were plotting this!"

She felt her stomach drop and her knees go weak beneath her. Even though the ground had been ripped from her, she felt as though she would she would fall to it. Delores took a deep breath as she faced the giant, her knuckles white as she gripped the grimy, disgusting fingers of the creature. She was relieved as her voice come out stronger than she felt, with her commands resounding across the little clearing in the woods where they stood.

The beast obviously felt her authority as it looked as though it was about to place her down. That was until –  
"Half-breed scum!" She screamed as the Centaurs burst from the forest and surrounded her. _This was not a good day for Delores Umbridge._

* * *

Drabble 4 - 168

 _Announcer:  
Welcome to the Annual Most-Evil-(as well as down-right Disgusting)-Villain-In-The-Universe Awards._

 _It is a surprisingly common talent for someone to find glee in others' misery. As far as I can tell you, Delores Umbridge is one of the most talented people in this area that I have ever met. Her current job is terrorising students at the prestigious Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry._

 _Delores:  
Thank you, thank you. What a lovely introduction. I have never been more proud of winning an award for a competition that I did not enter. There have been many notable villains in my time. Grindelwald, You-Know-Who, and now me! I just want to thank all those that made this possible: My parents, the Minister (my future lover), Harry Potter, Dumble-snore and mostly me._

Delores shot awake, her forehead sweaty as she looked around the cramped quarters of the teachers room at Hogwarts. This was a weird but enjoyable dream for her, and definitely not the first or last of it's kind.

* * *

Drabble 5 - 120

Her eyes ran across each of their faces as she watched them stare blankly at the pages. There was a soft murmur among the class as some dared to express their boredom, and even those who had turned to frustration. Delores grinned at the look of utter lethargy and languor among the students; some barely bothering to pretend to read the course material.

This is exactly how she liked it. They will learn what the Ministry has outlined and not risk themselves or any property as they do so. Safe. Calm. Easy. This way she was able to watch out for the troublesome ones, and stop riots and _naughty_ behaviour before the students even think of it themselves. _Brilliant, Delores!_

* * *

 **A/N: This was soooo fun! Thank you. Words: 904**


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